I want to preface this post by saying- we’ve only been on the wait list for 32 days. I know that there are people that are in programs with wait lists that are over a year, and those people are absolute heroes, because I don’t know how they do it. Today has been hard. For two reasons, I think.
1) For some reason I mistakenly got it into my head that today was the day, which is ridiculous, given I had absolutely no good reason to think that, and
2) TruGreen lawn care called me and for some obnoxious reason, my agency’s ring tone came on, leading me to believe THIS IS IT for a small moment in time. Once the woman introduced herself on the phone, I felt like my heart, which had blown up like a balloon at the sound of that ring tone, just popped. Yes, that sounds melodramatic. Yes, this adoption has turned me into a drama queen. But yeah, it was pretty horrible. I’ll just call it what it was, and it was bad. After I realized that my #)*#$) phone had tricked me, I became irrationally angry at everything, from Trugreen to Verizon to the toys laying on the floor. I basically became a horrible person for the rest of the day. Yes, I continued to parent and clean dishes and be nice to my neighbors, but inside I was channeling some serious Tyrion Lannister. You know, all tortured inside.
I honestly don’t think I would have felt this way if it hadn’t been for that stupid false alarm.
Grace. That’s what I need to give the TruGreen people if they call back. Doesn’t that sound nice? But in reality, this is what they’re going to get.
Stay away, TruGreen.